Monochrome
by EilanCornflower
Summary: Mikan struggles to hold on to her father's memory years after he abandoned his family. But this proves difficult when her mother remarries the newly widowed Mr. Hyuga. Now Mikan is trapped in a new house, and a new school with a new set of rules, and worst of all, a new step brother: Natsume Hyuga.
1. When one door closes

**Chapter One **

**When one door closes**

**Another always opens **

_What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us_

_What we have done for others, and the world, remains with us and is immortal_

_Albert Pike

OoOoOoOo

The stars glittered like diamonds on the water, turning the placid, glassy surface into silver. I stared quietly into the depths, looking for some _explanation, _just a simple sign, anything would do. All I wanted was a reason for my father leaving, stranding me with my already mentally unsound mother.

A silvery tear slid down my face and splashed into the dark water, leaving ripples in its wake. I crumpled into a heap on the riverbank, rocking back and forth and crying like a baby. I had never felt so alone.

It was the worse kind of agony, knowing that he was gone, but not knowing why. Not knowing if he would show up at the front door again, flowers in hand, and a big sheepish grin on his face. I had to relive my disappointment every night.

The weeks faded into months, which in turn faded into years. The raw, burning pain ebbed into a dull ache, and I grew from an awkward Middle Schooler into an awkward High Schooler.

I watched as my mother changed too, she went from a fragile wreck of a woman, into an adventurous, flighty one, that acted more like a teenager than an adult with a fifteen year old daughter. I watched as man after man came into our life and left with out even saying good bye.

I expected the same outcome when my mother came home with Hiroto Hyuga. But as I watched the two of them, I realized that they were falling in love, and that there was nothing that I could do to stop it. Hiroto Hyuga had been my mother's best friend's husband, and when Mom's best friend died, it left the very handsome Hiroto a widower, and a single father of two.

It wasn't that I didn't like Hiroto, it's that he wasn't father, and even though he tried hard, I couldn't trust him, I couldn't trust any man. He smiled at me over the dinner table, looking every bit as nervous as I felt.

"Do you like your school, Mikan?" he asked, his voice was soft and soothing, and when he smiled, laugh lines crinkled his eyes.

"Not really." I said, staring studiously at my plate.

"What do you think about transferring schools?" asked Mom, spooning more eggs onto Hiroto's already half un-eaten plateful. My head snapped up, and I could practically feel my pupils dilating.

"Are we moving?" I asked mom. She looked nervous, and as far as answers went, that was as loud as a yell.

"We need to have a talk Mikan…" she said. I waited, my fork half way to my mouth. Mom looked at Hiroto and offered him a watery smile.

"Hiroto and I have really hit it off Mikan…" she said. Hiroto beamed at me, his smile was genuine, he looked elated. I looked at mom, whose happiness wanted to bubble to the surface, but she was nervous of how I would take it.

"And, I think that you _need _a father figure…after what ha…after Izumi left…" I saw mom's lip tremble.

"I think Hiroto would make a wonderful father."

I glanced at Hiroto, his brick red eyes shone with love for my mother, for me, for our family. I looked back at mom; my stomach felt like it was full of rocks.

"What are you getting at mom?" I asked. She smiled weakly at me, and fished around in her pocket, pulling out a little silver ring with a large diamond on it. I began choking on air.

Hiroto reached over to pat my back, he looked nervous. When I was done nearly dying, mom pulled me into her arms like she used to do when I was ten.

"I don't want to be alone anymore Mikan, it's been 4 years since Izumi left, you were only eleven, I need to move on Mikan. I don't want to spend the rest of my life all alone." She said, and I struggled to understand.

"Do you love him?" I asked, my voice cracking. Mom nodded as her fingers traced graceful patterns in my back.

"I do, Mikan." I sucked in a deep breath.

"When's the wedding?" I asked, meeting her eyes, as brown as mine, her excitement was finally allowed to pour out of her. She smiled.

"It's in December."

"When are we moving?" I asked weakly.

"Next week." She said.

OoOoOoOo

Moving wasn't so bad. We were staying in the same area, just moving into a more…upper class place. The house was huge, painted warm colors with a gray slate roof. And a vast, rambling, slightly over grown garden.

Statues peeked at me from behind trees and flower bushes. A flash of color caught my eye, and I saw a koi pond, with jade and turquoise glittering in the water, along with the graceful koi, shining like jewels in the water.

Hiroto led us along a marble walkway, he seemed as bright as the sun, Mom was absolutely beside herself with joy. I tugged at the dress I was wearing, a stuffy Victorian-style dress, pink with ribbons. Hiroto had bought it for me. It was uncomfortable, but it was beautiful.

Hiroto led us to the double doors at the entrance, great red oak doors that were smooth to the touch, carved with what looked life fire. Hiroto grinned at my mother as he opened the door, revealing a spacious entry way, antique armoires and curios filled with expensive looking figurines. Ornamental vases filled with dried hydrangea and peony flowers. Framed paintings of wild animals and verdant forests all clustered around a stairwell, leading up into the upper reaches of the house (it had to be at least 3 stories.)

The entire place was exquisite, and at the base of the stairs stood two equally exquisite people, I could tell by the first glance that they were Hiroto's children. A little girl, she couldn't be more than five, jumped up and down to get a better look at us. Her black hair was tied up into two pigtails and her face was split in a wide grin. Beside her, holding her pudgy hand in his, was a boy about my age, he was so sinfully handsome, with disheveled raven hair and intense red eyes.

I felt my breath catch as he looked over my mom, and then turned his gaze to me, his eyes wandering up my body. When his eyes met mine, he glared full force, his eyes filled with such a violent hatred that it stole my air from my lungs. Hiroto beamed at the two children.

"This is my daughter, Aoi." He said, beckoning the girl to him, she marched right past him and placed herself in front of me, her hands on her hips as she looked me over, much like her brother had. But when she was done she grinned at me

"You're pretty!" she said. I smiled at her.

"I'm Mikan." I said, she lifted her arms for me to lift her up, and I gladly did so, placing her on my shoulders.

Hiroto motioned to the boy, who was watching silently with a bored expression.

"This is Natsume, my son, he's one year older than you Mikan." Said Hiroto with a wide smile.

"You two will be attending private school together."

**A/N: **I revised it! I have a very hard time writing in 3rd person, so I made some changes. I wrote the original when I was half asleep, so it was pretty bad. Anyways, I hope you like it! Please feel free to comment/ask questions/make suggestions. Thanks!


	2. Trying to Connect

**Chapter Two**

**Trying to connect **

_If you don't like something, change it. _

_If you can't change it, change your attitude._

_Maya Angelou

OoOoOoOo

Dinner was an absolute nightmare; Natsume spent the entire time alternately looking disgusted with everything to glaring holes into my skull. Aoi prattled on about how she was convinced that I was a "Princess in disguise" and how that was okay, because she was too. And Mom and Hiroto spent the entire time wrapped in each other's arms.

The room we ate in was called the "Monochrome" room. It was colored in shades of gray, and black and white, it was somewhat frightful and gloomy, but by the elated grin that mom was giving, you'd think the room was a fairy land.

"Are you excited to see your new bedroom Mikan?" asked Hiroto, he seemed completely oblivious to his son's apparent hatred of me. He turned and beamed happily at the boy.

"You'll be right down the hall from Natsume." He said. I forced a smile and Natsume let out an audible groan. Hiroto shot him a look.

"Yuka and I decorated it for you, we think you'll like it." he continued. Mom giggled, snuggling into his side. I fought the urge to gag.

"Great." I said, noncommittally. Aoi blinked up at me with her big red eyes, she looked just like a cute female version of her brother.

"Can we have a sleep over?" she asked. I looked at Hiroto for confirmation and he nodded.

"Are you sure you want to trust Aoi with this girl?" asked Natsume, speaking up for the first time that evening. I shot him a glare, his dislike of me was completely unjustified, I hadn't done anything wrong, and he had no reason to be such an ass hole. Hiroto sighed, and turned to me.

"Natsume's just a little rough around the edges, he's a good kid, I promise." Natsume scoffed.

"You can sleep with Mikan if it's alright with her, Aoi." Said Hiroto. Aoi smiled at me, and I nodded at her.

"Sure, we'll have fun." I said. I could at least get along with _one _of the siblings.

OoOoOoOo

My room was gorgeous, the walls were painted a beautiful peppermint pattern, red and white stripes giving the room a candy cottage look. My bed was huge, with a white canopy and a red comforter, crowded with fluffy pillows. The carpet was pink, and my feet sunk into it like I was wading through water, soft, feathery water.

Aoi looked absolutely captivated; she collapsed on my bed and rolled around, giggling to herself. I sat beside her and smiled up at the ceiling.

"Let's paint your nails." I said.

OoOoOoOo

"There ya go." I grinned as I held up Aoi's hand to the light of the lamp. Her fingernails were painted a pretty shell-pink. She smiled brightly at me, and then set to blowing on her nails.

"Lets show Natsume-onii-chan!" she said. I winced, but nodded, I couldn't very well tell her that her big brother was Satan spawn.

She tugged at me to go with her. I followed obediently, dreading it all the way. She had me knock on the door, because she didn't want to damage her nails. And after what seemed like hours, and with much shuffling and loud footsteps from the other side of the door, the door flew open, and there stood a very angry looking, very shirtless Natsume.

My mouth suddenly went dry. It was difficult to tear my eyes from his *gulp* wonderfully tanned…toned chest. He seemed to notice, and his mouth curved up into a condescending smirk.

"Am I being invited to the sleepover?" he asked, his voice was soft, sexy, almost a purr. I felt my eyes harden immediately.

"Not unless you submit yourself to dress up and nail painting." I returned. Aoi flashed her nails at him. His smirk faded, but his eyes softened.

"Do I look beautiful?" she asked. Spinning around in her Hello Kitty nightgown for affect, Natsume nodded. I smiled at his sudden tenderness; he caught me, and shot me a hateful glare.

"For you to look beautiful, it'll take a lot more work." He said, his voice suddenly bitter. I quickly looked for something to throw, coming up short, I settled for delivering a kick to his shin. He winced, but other than that, he didn't react much.

Aoi paused in her twirling, and looked at the both of us carefully for a moment, as if considering.

"is Daddy getting married?" she asked Natsume. He glanced at me and back at Aoi.

"Yeah, to Yuka." He said. Aoi turned to me and summed me up for a while.

"And Auntie Yuka is your Momma?" she asked. I nodded, and smiled. She turned back to Natsume, the gears turning in her little head.

"So are Natsume-onii-chan and Mikan-onee-chan gonna get married too?" she asked, and if I wasn't to busy being shocked and mortified, the sweet innocence in her voice would have made me hug her.

"Hell no!" exclaimed Natsume, and I shot him a look. Aoi giggled at the word. I bent down and brushed some of her midnight black hair out of her face.

"Adults only get married when they're very in love." I told her. She cocked her head to the side.

"You and Natsume-onii-chan aren't very in love?" she asked. I shook my head

"No, Natsume and I are going to be brother and sister once our parent's get married, and that's a different kind of love." I explained. She smiled up at me.

"Will you be Aoi's sister too?" she asked. I nodded lightly. And she smiled, flashing me her pretty white teeth, the fronts of which were missing.

She turned on her heel and skipped back to my room; I turned to follow her, but was stopped when Natsume cleared his throat. I turned resentfully to face him.

"Your mom really loves my dad, eh?" he asked, studiously avoiding my eyes. I could feel the ache in him, even though he didn't show it.

"Yeah, I guess so. He's a good man…your father." I said, studying his face. Natsume looked at me for a moment. His eyes were full of resentment, and anger, but there was something new there; respect.

"Yeah, he is." He said, he turned away and shut the door, I followed after Aoi.

**A/N: **I am working on my adjectives, trying to paint a picture with my words. I've been reading a lot, Flowers in the Attic, Daughter of smoke and Bone, some Stephen King. So my writing might have been a little bit affected by all of my reading, but I hope it's still good. Again any comments/questions/suggestions are welcomed, and will be replied to. I love you guys!


	3. Change in Pace

**Chapter Three**

**Change in Pace **

_God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,_

_The courage to change the things I can,_

_And the wisdom to know the difference. _

_Reinhold Niebuhr

OoOoOoOo

I posed in front of the mirror in my new school uniform, it was simple, but tasteful and even what one might call…fancy. It was a blue chequered skirt, and a white blouse with short fluffy sleeves, and a blue ribbon tied into the collar. Not quite a sailor outfit, but close. I twirled a few times, secretly enjoying the new outfit. I was shaken out of my admiration by a rap on my door.

I opened it warily, expecting to see my mother, chiding me for wasting time, instead I saw Natsume, standing in his own uniform. His hair was characteristically disheveled, and his shirt was partially unbuttoned, he had foregone his bowtie. He looked me over, snorting in disapproval before turning around and marching towards the stairs. I scowled and followed after him, shoving my hands into the small pockets sewn onto my skirt.

As we reached the top of the stairs Natsume hesitantly looped his arm through mine, giving me a resentful look so that I knew it wasn't his idea. The brush of his arm against mine sent sparks through me and raised goose bumps on my pale skin. He didn't seem to notice. Mom and Hiroto whooped in admiration as we descended the stairs like royalty. I sarcastically dipped into a one armed curtsey, sending my mom giggling.

As we got to ground level we broke apart and Hiroto and my mom gave us a round of applause. Natsume ran a hand through his hair and sighed as if this was all very exhausting.

"You look beautiful Mikan." My mom told me. I smiled, feeling my cheeks heating up. Hiroto whistled

"You're a real knock out Mikan, just like your mother." He gave my mom an affectionate squeeze. I liked Hiroto.

"You look quite dashing yourself Natsume." Said my mom, Natsume dipped his head in thanks.

"You must be quite the charmer at school." She said. He mustered a slow smile that made my heart flutter.

"Not at all ma'am, I'm too focused on my studies for anything of that sort." He said, the picture of politeness. I wanted to chuck my school bag at him.

"Onee-chan!" Aoi appeared at the top of the stairs, running as fast as her five year old legs could take her. She catapulted herself into my arms, holding onto me for dear life.

"You look beautiful Aoi." I told her. Her uniform was like a miniature version of mine, colored red instead of blue.

Hiroto motioned towards the front doors with the fire engravings. We all straightened up, Aoi still cuddled in my arms, and headed out the door, filing into the champagne colored Lexus. I was pressed in between Aoi and Natsume. I tried to suppress the excitement that was welling up inside of me at the prospect of a new start. I wondered if I would make any new friends. I swallowed nervously; maybe I would even get a boyfriend.

I peeked at Natsume from the corner of my eye. I didn't think that he meant it when he said he was too busy studying to have a girlfriend. He wasn't the type to be studious; I bet he had a ton of girls fawning all over him, despite his abrasive personality. I swallowed thickly as the school loomed ahead of us.

The grounds were crowded with other people, clustered together, talking, laughing. These people had known eachother all of our lives, I was the outside, no one knew me, and I knew no one. I was alone in a crowded place. I kissed Aoi good bye as Natsume and I stepped out of the car. Immediately Natsume was greeted by a number of females (Whom he ignored) and a rather handsome blond boy, who stopped and stared at me.

"Is she your girlfriend Natsume?" I blanched as the boy looked me over. He was very handsome, but in a softer way than Natsume. He looked more open and friendly than Natsume did. Natsume threw me a sarcastic look and turned back to the boy.

"Do you think I would date a flat chested idiot like her?" He asked. I folded my arms over my chest self consciously.

"So that means she's available?" one of the boys in the gathering crowd leered at me. I pulled my arms tighter around me, Natsume shrugged his shoulders. But something in his expression made the guy back off. He jammed his hands in his pockets and stalked away, muttering something under his breath. The blond boy stepped closer to me, eying me, but I didn't get the creepy feeling I got from the other boy.

"I'm Nogi Ruka." He said brightly, his grin was sweet and sincere.

"But you can just call me Ruka."

Natsume snorted and shot Ruka a look. Ruka simply chuckled and followed after him, waving at me as he left. I liked Ruka, he was definitely boyfriend potential. I was about to walk into the school when I felt a short tug on my uniform sleeve. I turned around to face two girls, my age, one with dark inky black hair that looked almost blue and fell to her waist, and the other with curly pink hair that swept the back of her thighs. They looked friendly enough, I proffered a smile.

"Hello." I said quickly, they smiled nervously at eachother, and then at me.

"D-did you come to school with Natsume Hyuga?" said the one with pink hair. I nodded, tiredly. They looked at eachother again.

"Are you two…together?" asked the black haired one. I shook my head.

"My mom and his dad just got married." I explained.

"I really can't stand the guy."

The nervousness quickly melted from their features turning them into regular, friendly looking girls.

"I'm Nonoko." Said the one with the black hair, extending her hand for me to shake, the other bounced up and down on the balls of her feet.

"And I'm Anna!" she exclaimed cheerfully. I smiled at both of them.

"I'm Mikan." They surprised me by both throwing their arms around me in a hug.

"We're gonna be best friends!" said Anna. I laughed, feeling elated.

**A/N: **I love writing this story! I hope to get into the complex relationship between Natsume and Mikan in the future. I have to make it realistic though, No one goes from hating someone, to loving them over night, so it will take serious progress on both parts! Please continue reading. Comments/Questions/Suggestions are welcome!


	4. Highschool Girls

**Chapter Four **

**High School Girls **

_Everything in High School seems like the most important thing that's ever happened in your life _

_It's not._

_You'll get out of high school and you'll never see those people again. _

_All those people who press you and torment you won't make a difference in your life in the long haul_

___Mark Hoppus

OoOoOoOo

Classes flew by at a breakneck speed; I was surrounded by people constantly, asking me questions, where I came from, what my hobbies were, and most importantly: how I knew Natsume Hyuga. I was a subject of interest; everyone was trying to get a look at me, all because of Natsume. I'm not gonna lie, I kind of liked the attention.

Anna and Nonoko stuck with me through it all. I was grateful for that. They were talkers, but they were nice, and I enjoyed their company. I only saw Natsume in passing, but Ruka and I had biology together, and we spent the class chatting. I really liked Ruka, with his pretty blond hair, honest blue eyes, and open smile; we hit it off immediately, though I couldn't see why he was Natsume's best friend.

"So your mom married Mr. Hyuga?" he asked, his smile never leaving his face. I nodded, tapping my pencil on the desk. Our teacher was rambling brightly about genetics. He was a rather flamboyant man, dressed in somewhat effeminate clothing, but he was interesting and kind, and I liked him right off the bat.

"Was it difficult? I mean, I've been to Natsume's house a lot, and it's nice, _really _nice, but it's not _homey _if you get what I mean." He said, and I did get it, it was big and beautiful, but not comfortable.

"My room is homey." I told him by way of answer. He smiled at me.

"I would like to see it some time." He said. My face heated up, and Ruka's eyes widened when he caught what he'd said.

"I-I didn't mean that in flirtation…" he said.

I knew that, Ruka wasn't that kind of person. But by the snickers Anna and Nonoko were making I had a feeling that he was maybe just a little bit interested in me. I flinched when a bright light lit the room from behind me and I heard the click of an old fashioned camera. I spun in my seat and was greeted with more blinding flashes. Narumi didn't seem to notice.

"Hotaru." Ruka muttered in that angry, sort of embarrassed way that I found remarkably adorable. I turned around in my seat and looked for this mysterious "Hotaru". I found her almost immediately, and she took my breath away. She was beautiful, with short, dark hair and stunning violet eyes. When she caught me looking at her, she instantly started taking pictures again, flashes lit up behind my eyelids.

"Who's she?" I asked Ruka, as if I had spotted some runaway movie star. Ruka offered a lopsided grin.

"Imai Hotaru. She's the president of the school newspaper club, and it looks like she's just got her new scoop." He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, breathing in deeply.

"She's a lot more trouble than she's worth." He said, but there was a sort of fondness in his voice, and I could tell that he didn't hate her nearly as much as he let on.

I turned around in my seat once again and waved at her. She stared mildly back at me, apparently done taking my picture. Without a second glance she returned to her work. My smile fell.

"I think she likes you." Said Ruka with a chuckle. I gave him a confused look; she hadn't looked like she cared about me one way or the other. Ruka simply grinned knowingly at me, and we spent the rest of the period in relative silence.

OoOoOoOo

At lunch, I made it a point to sit next to Imai. She fascinated me, and I wanted to be her friend. She didn't look up as I settled myself next to her, she was focused on the book in front of her.

"Hello." I said quietly. She nodded, not looking up from her book, but her acknowledgement encouraged me.

"I'm Sakura Mikan, but you can call me Mikan, can I call you Hotaru?" I asked. She nodded again, and I beamed at her.

I spent the rest of the lunch period talking to her, she didn't pay much attention to me, but I didn't mind. She felt really familiar somehow; talking to her was easy, even when she didn't talk back. Towards the end of the lunch period, I noticed the lunch room suddenly getting quiet. I turned around to look for the cause. It took me a while to find it, but when I did, I felt bile in my throat.

It was Natsume, with a girl latched onto his arm. A pretty girl, who was staring adoringly into his face. I knew he had been lying to my mom when he said he was too busy with his studies to get a girlfriend. But, upon closer inspection, it didn't look like he was too fond of having this particular girlfriend. He looked tenser than I had ever seen him, and his eyes kept darting this way and that.

His eyes fell on me, and he instantly changed direction, heading to where I was sitting with Hotaru. I pleaded with my eyes for him to go away, but that seemed to give him immense satisfaction, and I groaned as he took a seat next to me.

"What?" I asked, my voice a mixture of exhaustion and frustration. The girl at his side glared at me and pouted her painted lips.

Up close I could see that she wasn't all that perfect. Her amber eyes were a little too wide set, and her makeup was spread noticeable over her large pores. Her blonde hair was straw colored rather than honey, as I had previously thought. Natsume smirked as he saw me examining her. He didn't say anything to me, making things even more awkward. I wished he would just leave.

"You haven't eaten much." He said finally, eying my mostly empty plate. I stared at him, was this his way of making conversation? I sighed and shoveled a fork full of spaghettti into my mouth, chewing and swallowing and giving him a look that said: _are you happy? You can eave now. _He did not obey my mental suggestion.

I turned my attention back to the girl, and offered a hopeful smile. It was my first day of school, and I didn't want to make any enemies. Her sentiments were not the same, evidently, as she tilted her chin up and closed her eyes in a snooty gesture.

"Who's this _thing, _Natsume?" she asked. I flinched, and then glared at her.

"My stepsister." He said, his voice sounded bored, but there was an air of defensiveness in it, I appreciated that.

Luna looked angry at that, she turned her head to the side, telling me plainly that I was going to be ignored. I also appreciated that. Natsume reached out a hand and grabbed my roll off of my plate. He had taken several large bites out of it before I could protest, so I just sighed and let him get away with it.

"Why didn't you get your own lunch?" I muttered. The girl next to him turned to glare at me again, and Natsume just shrugged his shoulders.

I leaned towards Imai.

"Who _is _that girl." I whispered, not really expecting an answer. I was surprised when I got one.

"She's Koizumi Luna." She said, her voice was cold and mechanical.

"And _you _are screwed."

**A/N: **Yay for conflict! I tend to use Luna as the bad guy in all of my Gakuen Alice stories. But she's just so hateable! Anyways, she's not the main antagonist. Comments/Questions/Suggestions! Thanks!


	5. Jealousy

**Chapter Five **

**Jealousy **

_A woman whose smile is open _

_And whose expression is glad _

_Has a kind of beauty no matter what she wears._

___Anne Roiphe

OoOoOoOo

_Who is Koizumi Luna? _The question had been stuck in my mind all day. Natsume sat beside me in the back of the Lexus, eyes trained on the front window, not looking to the side, and certainly not looking down. He was inapproachable. I chewed my lip nervously, how was I ever going to bring it up?

I turned my face to look out the window. Why did it even bother me? So Natsume had a groupie and that groupie happened to hate me. It wasn't something I'd usually have lost sleep over, but there was not denying that sink-hole like feeling in my gut.

"Will you turn the radio on?" I asked Hiroto, looking for a distraction. Hiroto happily complied.

I closed my eyes and listened to the music, it was a beautiful song, melodious, and entirely about jealousy. My eyes flew open, _jealousy? _There was no way. I shot Natsume a sideways glance. I was not jealous of Luna, it wouldn't make sense. Not only did I not even remotely enjoy Natsume's company, but Natsume didn't like Luna!

I curled my hands into fists on my lap. I just couldn't explain it, why did I feel so uncomfortable?

"Is something wrong, Mikan?" asked Hiroto, adjusting his mirror to get a better look at me. I faked a smile.

"Nothing, I'm good!" I said, noting that I sounded, perhaps _too _cheery.

Hiroto looked at me for along moment, I had the distinct and uncomfortable feeling that he didn't believe me. I turned a little and caught Natsume giving me a similar look.

"How was your day at School?" asked Hiroto, that look of suspicion still etched on his face.

I toned down my smile a bit, and said honestly

"It was good for the most part, I made four new friends right off the bat." My smile widened and I shot Natsume a glance.

"Natsume helped of course." I watched him flinch. "He even sat next to me during lunch." He was full on glaring at me now, and I felt a _tiny _bit guilty for outright teasing him like this, but it was an occupational hazard. Hiroto looked like he was going to burst into tears from pride.

"Any good looking boys?" he asked pleasantly. I shivered, feeling Natsume's gaze harden.

"I met a nice boy." I said quietly, noncommittally. Hiroto kept his eyes trained on me. They were so much like Natsume's and yet so different. Where Hiroto was warm, Natsume was cold and empty. I found myself wondering what had made Natsume so.

"His name is Nogi Ruka." I said, barely above a whisper. Natsume began to choke.

Hiroto glanced nervously at the boy as Natsume calmed down. It was Natsume who asked the next question.

"Why _Ruka?" _he asked, his voice little more than a gasp. I glared at him, already on the defensive due to his little coughing fit.

"Because Ruka is nice, and gentle, and caring. He never makes fun of me, he's never rude, and he _never _puts me in uncomfortable situations." Something filled Natsume's eyes, something I had never seen before. But as quickly as it came, it was gone, leaving no trace of having ever existed.

OoOoOoOo

We ate dinner that night in the Monochrome room. But mom had placed a single red flower in a vase in the center of the table, giving a little splash of color. I smiled at the little red blossom as I picked at my dinner. I didn't have much of an appetite, and mom and Hiroto kept shooting nervous glances at me.

Natsume kept his eyes studiously on his plate. Since the incident in the car, he hadn't said a word to me. Not that I made it easy on him, my emotions were bouncing back and forth between guilt and satisfaction. But currently, guilt was winning. I sighed, looking away from the flower and stirring another packet of sugar into my hot mint tea.

"Mikan, that's your fifth-" began my mother, but Hiroto silenced her with a hand on her shoulder.

Natsume snorted. And I glanced at him hopefully; he looked coolly back and said.

"How unsurprising that someone like _you _would have a sweet tooth." He said, and I broke into a wide smile. I had been forgiven. That small sentence had conveyed more, probably than he had meant to convey. But I was happy, even with out him outright saying that he wasn't mad any more. The silence had been killing me.

I realized then, that Natsume had become almost a friend, in the week we'd spent together. No…friend wasn't the right word. Maybe…co-conspirators?

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, trying to pout convincingly. Natsume just shook his head. Aoi looked between us, once again, the little gears in her head were turning, I could see it. Suddenly, she too broke out into a knowing smile.

OoOoOoOo

"I can't figure out math!" Anna complained on the other line. I sighed, coiling and uncoiling the phone wire around my finger.

"And you're asking me? I can barely figure out addition." I chuckled as Anna whined for the 50th time in this one phone conversation. Aoi sat beside me, kicking her legs in the air, and waiting impatiently for me to get off of the phone.

"Maybe Aoi knows." I told Anna, elbowing Aoi playfully. Aoi giggled and flopped over on her side. Anna was quiet on the other side, that was new. Finally, she spoke up, nervously.

"Maybe…Natsume knows…" she said, her voice almost a whisper. My smile faded. Sure Natsume and I weren't angry at eachother now, but I didn't want to go plowing into his room and asking him math advice.

"Um, Anna, I don't think that's a good idea…Natsume is…testy." I said, looking at Aoi, who had sat back up and was looking back at me with confusion.

"Oh _please _Mikan?" she begged. "Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease!" I sighed, and looked at my door.

"Alright, but you'll have to call me back." I said. I could practically _feel _Anna grinning.

"Deal!"

**A/N: **Hoo boy! I've been busy! Needlessly busy. Turns out, my friends still like me and want me to hang out with them sometimes? Who would have guessed? Well, I'll get to be a shut in these next coupla days, so expect more updates. Comments/Questions/Suggestions!


	6. Math Help

**Chapter Six **

**Math Help **

_Sometimes the Heart sees _

_What is invisible to the eye_

___H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

OoOoOoOo

"Will you help me and Anna with Math this Saturday?" the words fell from my mouth like a nervous waterfall. Natsume quirked an eyebrow at me, and then went to shut the door. I stuck my foot in the crack.

"Natsume, I _need _you! If you don't get me through math I'll never finish high school, so I'll end up being a bum and I'll never get married, do you want that for me?"

"I'm sure Ruka would marry you." He said coolly, motioning to the cell phone that he held by his side. He punched the speaker button, and Ruka's voice filled the room, along with a healthy amount of static.

"Is that Mikan? Can I talk to her?" I smothered a giggle. Natsume rolled his eyes.

"You're on speaker Ruka." He said into the phone. The line went quiet for a moment.

"How much did she hear?"

I cocked my head to the side. Wondering what I had missed, from the embarrassment in Ruka's tone and the rolling of Natsume's eyes, I suspected that it had been something good.

"She missed the part about you telling me she was hot, if that's what you're asking." Said Natsume. I felt my cheeks heat up.

"Natsume!" Ruka yelled on the other line.

I reached for the phone but Natsume held it just out of reach.

"She wants me to help her with Math." Said Natsume, a devilish smirk manifesting on his handsome face.

"So help her!" said Ruka. Natsume's eyes darkened.

"Why don't you?" he asked. I shook my head violently.

"I want you to help me." I mouthed. Natsume's eyes flickered for a moment. And he shrugged his shoulders.

"She wants me to help her this time." He said into the phone. Ruka waited a while before saying

"Oh." He sounded hurt. I reached for the phone; this time Natsume let me have it.

"Don't worry Ruka, I'd rather do fun stuff with you." I said brightly. Natsume twitched. His brow furrowing.

"Great!" Said Ruka, the excitement showing in his voice.

"How about a movie this Sunday?" I smiled.

"Definitely." Was all I said back.

OoOoOoOo

"And then what happened?" Anna asked on the other line. I had told her all that had happened with Natsume and Ruka.

"Natsume got all quiet. Back to his grumpy self I guess." I said.

"But did he say he would help me?" she asked. I nodded, then caught myself and said.

"Yes." Anna squealed in delight.

"Things are looking up for both of us." She purred. I smiled. Things _were _looking up.

OoOoOoOo

Saturday loomed before me like a storm. Spending time alone with Natsume and Anna, with all of her stolen glances and coy comments was really not on my list of things to do. But once the storm passed I would be free to go on a date with Ruka. I was so excited.

Natsume seemed to disapprove of my happiness. Whenever he caught me daydreaming he would clap his hands in front of my face, or even pinch me. But the rest of the time he was silent, brooding. But that wasn't really out of the ordinary.

"When is your friend coming?" he asked blandly as I rubbed my latest pinch wound. I looked at the clock

"She's coming at about 3:00, so in a half an hour or so." Natsume snorted, he was getting impatient, drumming his long white fingers on the table. All of my attempts at conversation fell flat. It was miserable; I couldn't see how Anna could be attracted to him.

"Is your friend attracted to me?" He asked suddenly, studiously avoiding my eyes. I bit my lip, unsure what Anna would think about me telling him. I shrugged my shoulders.

"I'm not sure." I said. He gave me a look, and I dissolved into nervous laughter. The doorbell rang. I darted to my feet.

"I'll get it!" I yelled as I ran down the stairs two steps at a time.

Anna looked stunning, her normally frizzy pink hair had been perfectly curled, and the color brought out the blush dusting her cheeks. Her blue eyes were lined with brown eyeliner making them pop. And she wore a simple white cotton dress and white platform sandals. I was suddenly aware of how plain I looked compared to her.

"Your house is _huge _Mikan! I'm so jealous!" Anna gushed, throwing her arms around me. I smiled and patted her back.

"Lets go." She whispered in my ear.

"I've never seen Natsume in casual clothes before." Her eyes glimmered in excitement. I smiled back as I led her up the stairs and towards the Monochrome room, where we would be studying.

When Anna saw Natsume she suddenly became shy, blushing and looking down at her delicate, sandaled feet. Natsume studied her, and quirked an eyebrow, before inviting her (rather gruffly) to sit down. After Anna was sat down and comfortable, he motioned for me to sit down on the other side of him, so that we could all get a good look at the textbook he had in front of him.

"How long do you have Anna?" I asked, peeking around Natsume's broad shoulders.

"An hour or so." Said Anna, looking pretty disappointed at her lack of time.

"My mom wants to have the family eat out tonight." She explained. I nodded, Natsume acted like he had heard, instead scribbling something on a piece of scratch paper.

"What are you doing?" I asked him.

"Be quiet" he said, his voice clipped and impatient.

"If I'm going to help you two you're going to do it my way." He folded the piece of scratch paper he was working on, and ripped another from his binder, scribbling on it also. Me and Anna exchanged glances behind his back. She looked giddy, while I was apprehensive.

Finally, once he was done with the other piece of paper, and had folded it, he scribbled our names on each piece and handed them to us. I opened mine with much trepidation, only to find that it was a reference sheet, graphs and tables broken down so that we could understand them, all written in a fine, practiced hand. I looked at Natsume in awe, he was taken his job quite seriously, and was already flipping to the page we needed in the text book.

I looked over at Anna who was gazing at Natsume with such admiration. That feeling began roiling in the bit of my stomach again…it wasn't…was I…Jealous?

**A/N: **Natsume's sweeter side is showing! Just a little bit. We'll see more of it in the future! Stay tuned! Comments/Questions/Suggestions.


End file.
